


Silence Will Not Cover Me

by AngelBless



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blind!Ignis, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, FFXV kinkmeme, Gen, Hurt!Noct, Hurt/Comfort, Mute!Noctis, Someone hug these boys, Spoilers for Chapter 10, ended up more noct/ignis focused than i intended, this started as a quick idea. i dont know what happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-27
Packaged: 2019-01-23 19:12:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12514472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelBless/pseuds/AngelBless
Summary: The Hydrean's rite left nothing but destruction in its wake. Noctis is mute. Ignis is blind. Everything is a mess. Nevertheless, there is a Crystal to reclaim, an Empire to defeat. They have to keep moving, no matter what.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This started as a simple one shot idea and turned into something so much more o_o Honestly, this is from my own prompt on the [kinkmeme](https://ffxv-kinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/4113.html?thread=7054609#cmt7054609), where Noct is rendered mute/almost mute. I fell in love with the idea way too much and and rolled with it~
> 
> I hope you'll all enjoy! Part 2 will be coming real soon! <3

Sounds of rushing water and distant words of farewell echoed through Noctis’ mind as he struggled to pry his eyes open, wincing at the sunlight that assaulted him. His head hurt, his throat felt like it had a vice around it. Where was he? He could blurrily see a figure sat across the room. Blinking to regain some focus, he recognised the back of Ignis’ head.

His lips parted to speak, to catch Ignis’ attention - a small choked noise escaped his throat as a pain stabbed through it. A hand shakily meeting his throat, he felt coarse material wrapped around his neck. His breathing hitched, sending another burst of pain across his throat, constricting his breath even more as his half-conscious mind raced.

What was happening? Why couldn’t he speak? _Oh gods, something was wrong—_

“Are you back with us, Noct?”

The voice snapped Noctis out of his panicked thoughts, but the pain lingered. Shuffling back weakly to sit further upright, he watched wide-eyed as Ignis cautiously rose from his chair, seemingly unsure of himself as he stood. As the advisor turned around, the scarring on his face became obvious, even behind his darkened glasses. Noct tried to say something, to ask if he was alright. Nothing came out. Why wasn’t any sound coming out?!

“Noct, I'm going to need you to stay calm,” Ignis said, his voice as composed as ever. “I’m afraid there is quite a lot to take in.”

It took an agonising few minutes before Ignis finally reached the bed, the rising dread in Noct’s chest only increasing further as pieces slowly began to fit together. Ignis’ injuries, the far too cautious way he approached. He could feel something in his left hand—no, he couldn’t look. He couldn’t bring himself confirm what he thought it was. He needed to focus on something else. _Anything_ else. At the sight of Ignis’ arm reaching out for assurance, the prince placed a hand on it, guiding Ignis’ own hand to the arm of a chair that waited beside his bed. The advisor let out a breath as he settled into his seat.

It was getting increasingly difficult for Noct to remain calm, as he took in the newly formed scarring on Ignis’ face. So many questions bubbled in his mind, but for some reason he couldn’t even _ask_.

“Noct,” Ignis finally said, turning his head to where he’d guessed the prince’s general direction was. “I must ask you this, and I’m sorry for being so blunt. Are you able to talk?”

Noctis tried, really he did. But the strangled wheeze—followed by a fit of coughing as he hunched forward—would be considered a laughable attempt at speech by anyone. Ignis’ hand found his back, rubbing it gently as Noct heaved in air through his burning throat.

“As we’d feared.” Ignis lowered his hand once more, a deeper frown settling on his face. “The injuries you sustained were quite severe, so I’ve been informed. But you took a particularly serious blow to your neck.” Noct’s hand went back to the material around his throat, fingers running carefully over it—bandages. “The prognosis is that you should recover, given a few weeks, but until then, please try to take things easy.”

Noct nodded to himself, instantly regretting it as his neck jabbed with pain once more. He looked up at Ignis, studying the scars on the man’s face, raising a trembling hand and hesitantly placing the lightest touch near the damage. Ignis’ hand rose to meet his, guiding it away.

“A small sacrifice in the greater battle,” he tried to assure the prince, though it did little to ease his mind. There was a pause as Ignis seemed to be considering his words. “I’m…afraid all I must tell you shall not be pleasant. Please, forgive me.”

 

It had been a lot to take in. Luna was dead, Ignis had been blinded, and much of Altissia lay in ruins. Noctis couldn’t understand—the whole thing had seemed an assured victory. He’d meet with Luna and they could take on the remaining trials and defeat the empire together, just like it was supposed to be. How had things gone so wrong? Blinking hard against the lingering images from last night’s less than pleasant series of dreams, he tried to suppress a yawn as he continued studying the scarring on his throat in the bathroom mirror.

It had only been a few days since he’d woken up, completely unaware of the resultant chaos around him, and merely hours since he’d had the uncomfortable bandages wrapped securely around his throat removed. All he’d wanted was to stay put in his room, alone with his thoughts and nothing to bother him, but Ignis had other ideas. He’d pestered Noct into visiting one of the available doctors to get an update on his condition, insisting he take Gladio or Prompto with him. As much as he’d loathed to wander through the broken streets of Altissia to get to the hospital, he couldn’t have refused his advisor the request.

Damnit though, did Ignis _have_ to always be so on the ball looking out for him? Surely he had much bigger issues to worry about—it boggled the mind how he was still so focused on everyone but himself.

Noct’s frown deepened. He hadn’t seen the other two for hours, so had decided to go it alone. But, as he continued to muse in front of the mirror, that brought about another problem; how would he even _tell_ Ignis any updates? Sure, he could text Prompto, but the whole thing seemed like too much of a hassle.

Especially when he’d received the same prognosis as Ignis had passed onto him merely days before. Assessed as ‘fine’, and instructed on vocal techniques to help with the recovery process and easing the pain.

Deep breaths, in and out. That was the main one he would practise for the moment. He’d admit that was something he’d become more lax on, even moreso when breathing deep would set off a coughing bout. It couldn’t be helped though—he’d been told breathing problems were expected, alongside issues with eating and drinking. The first time he’d started choking while eating bread with soup, he thought Ignis was going to have a heart attack.

But he shouldn’t complain, he knew it was wrong to. The people of Altissia were suffering, his own friends were suffering, the people of Eos would live in fear of the scourge without their Oracle.

Having no voice was nothing really—he’d got off lightly. Ignis’ unseeing eyes were proof of that.

“Noct? You in here?” The prince jumped a little at the sound of the familiar voice, leaving the bathroom to see Prompto closing the door behind him, a paper bag in hand. The blond grinned at the sight of his friend, but something about it seemed so forced. He missed Prompto’s genuine smiles, but there wasn’t exactly much to smile about lately. “Sorry, I sent you a message. Guess you were busy though.” He held up the bag. “See? I brought snacks!” Taking a seat on the bed, he began to rummage through everything as Noct sat beside him, watching. “I kinda bought a bit of everything—wasn’t really sure what you wanted,” he added sheepishly.

Noct couldn’t help but smile at his friend; Prompto had been an absolute blessing these past few days. How he’d managed to help both himself and Ignis out so much without having some double hiding around somewhere was a question for the ages. As he pondered the thought, a small stab of guilt ran through him—was Prompto getting enough time for himself? Was he sleeping okay? Eating right? Had those bags always been under his eyes—he couldn’t remember. He mentally cursed himself as he opened his mouth to ask, the sting in his throat halting him instantly. Thankfully, Prompto didn’t seem to notice.

“Okay, so…” The blond pulled out a couple of small packets. “I picked up cheese chips. You want some?” Noct shook his head quite decidedly, pulling a face. Prompto looked surprised at the response. “I thought you liked them.” Noct simply replied by pointing to his throat. “Oh yeah, they’re kinda sharp. Not good. Right…”

He set them aside and pulled out something else. “Chocolate’s good though, right?” He smiled as Noct nodded and handed one over, sighing contentedly as he pulled out a fruit bar for himself. “I brought some cake, too. Don’t tell Iggy though, he’d _flip_ if he fou—oh _shit_! I’m sorry!” He practically squeaked as he covered his mouth his with hands.

Noct, quite unperturbed, picked up his phone and typed out something, watching as Prompto’s phone buzzed, a message lighting up the screen.

_[It’s ok, nbd]_

Prompto looked back to the prince. “A-are you sure? I mean, that was kind of a really low blow—since you can’t tell Iggy _anything_ right now—I swear I didn’t mean it that way though! Oh man, I’m just making this worse aren’t I? I mean, I just— _mmffpphh!_ ” He was cut off as Noctis covered his friend’s mouth with his hand, before pointing to the text message once more. Prompto shoved the hand aside, an indignant look on his face. “Okay, _fine_.” He sighed, continuing to eat his fruit bar. “I’m still sorry though,” he added, voice muffled as he chewed.

Noctis ate his own bar slowly, mulling things over in his mind. The last few days hadn’t even felt real. So, _so_ much was wrong, so much rested on his shoulders to fix, and yet there was, practically kicking back and relaxing in the place he’d held a part in demolishing, with barely a moment alone long enough for everything to crash down upon him. The others made sure he was eating, drinking, taking care of himself.

They were amazing, but he couldn’t help but thinking how much everyone else needed their help so much more. The strange thought crossed his mind that if he hadn’t been injured, everyone would have most likely let him be, closed up in his own little bubble as he refused to accept the days passing, just wanting to work out the slew of emotions built up within him—to make some meagre sense of it all.

But, he _was_ injured, missing a piece of himself, just like Ignis was. Granted, not as big a piece, but something he wished to return, just so things could feel remotely normal again, so he could at least _try_ to be the king the others sorely needed him to be.

How he would manage that, however, he had no clue. And time was running out for finding the answers.

“You okay, Noct?” Shit, how long had he zoned out for? Nodding noncommittally, he frowned as Prompto nudged at the phone in Noct’s hand. “Come on, type to me bro. Ignis said you’d got your throat checked out today, right? Did Gladio go with you?” The prince began to type as Prompto waited patiently.

_[Couldn’t find him. Went by myself]_

Prompto pulled a face. “You’re still recovering dude, you really shouldn’t go it alone.” Noct rolled his eyes at his friend’s fretting. “So, what did they say?”

_[Said it’s fine, whatever that means. They gave me some exercises and that was it]_

“So...how were _they_ , then?” Prompto kept a close eye on Noct’s expression, his brows pinching in concern as his friend scowled, pausing before he responded.

It wouldn’t have been considered difficult by any means, had his throat not felt like it had just been mauled by a sabretusk. Some sound did come out, but it’s nothing anyone would have called actual speech. Apparently that had been the expected response, which was...good?

_[Ok I guess?]_

The blond cast him a long look, and Noct gave him an exaggerated eye roll.

_[I still can’t say anything yet, if that’s what you’re wondering]_

Prompto couldn’t help but let his smile falter for just a second. He knew it was naive to expect progress straight away, but he’d still been hoping for an odd word or two. “Well, these things take time, right? They said weeks, not days, after all.”

Did they even have weeks before Camelia Claustra decided her hospitality had stretched far enough? After all, it was because of his rite that Leviathan needed to be woken in the first place. The people of Altissia probably saw Noctis and his group as some kind of ill omen or something.

With the way things had gone, he was pretty sure they were right.

_[Where are the others anyway?]_

Noct was desperate to change the subject.

“Gladio’s with Ignis at the hospital right now. It’s just a check up, don’t worry.” Prompto nudged him reassuringly. “Sorry bud, you’re stuck with me for now,” he added with a smirk. Noct let out a tiny snort of amusement.

_[Did you see me complaining?]_

Prompto laughed as Noct grinned—the most genuine he’d seen in a while—even if it was for just a moment. All too quickly, it was gone again as he let out a breath, glancing distastefully at his phone.

_[I swear I’ve turned into carbuncle or something]_

It took the blond a second to realise what Noctis meant. “Wait, you mean your fuzzy little dream friend?” Noct nodded.

_[He can only talk through my phone. Idk how it doesn’t drive him crazy, this is so annoying]_

“You’ll get used to it. It’s only until your voice is all better, right?” A nagging feeling itched at the back of Noct’s mind as the words were spoken, but he nodded again anyway. “Oh yeah, we still got cake to eat!” Prompto pulled out a couple of napkins, grinning as he handed Noct a particularly delicious looking piece of sponge cake. “Don’t eat it too quick, Iggy’ll kill me if I let you choke.” Noct sent Prompto a quick ‘thanks’ text before taking the cake and digging in. The gunner’s smile was bittersweet as he watched his friend. Things would get better, he was sure of it. And until then, he’d just have to be extra careful to watch over everyone.

It would all turn out fine in the end. It had to.

 

“On your feet, you’re getting lunch out with us today.”

Gladio’s tactics were forward as always, and usually the prince would complain and dig his heels in further, but today...today he was pretty sure he needed it. It had been a pretty awful night, filled with visions of the rite, but somehow _worse_ . A dream world where he had been the only survivor, a solitary king against the might of the empire. Waking up to an empty room—silent cries alerting no one—only made it seem all the more _real_.

Noctis hauled himself to his feet, pocketing his phone as a lifeline as he moved to grab his boots and jacket. Gladio cast his eyes around the room, eventually settling on a particular object on Noct’s bedside table. “Still keeping that notebook close, huh?” he said casually, noting Noct’s body language as he tensed slightly at the mention. The prince glanced up, nodding slowly as he laced up his boot. “And the ring?”

Noct knew that question was coming up. He pointed to his jacket pocket, ignoring the way Gladio’s expression soured somewhat before sighing. “Well, at least it’s safe,” he said dismissively as he continued to wait.

 

They met with Prompto and Ignis in the foyer, and soon they were on their way to one of the few eateries that were still operational. As Noct sat at the table, chin rested on his palm, idly tapping on the table, Ignis quizzed Prompto over the menu, deciding the best food for Noct to eat. There he went again, not even thinking about himself. How could he just get on with things like that?

Then again, he was one to talk. He’d been frequently using his vocal exercises as a distraction from everything. He had no choice but to focus on getting better, to focus on being _stronger_ , even if that meant shoving his cacophony of thoughts down and hoping they wouldn’t resurface for a long while.

Maybe Ignis was doing the same thing.

“—kay with you dude? Hello?” A hand waved in front of his face and he jumped, looking up at Prompto’s worried face. “You feeling alright, buddy?”

He nodded. It was pretty much the best he could do at this point. Although he _had_ had a pretty good day with his voice so far, all things considered. A couple of days after his first therapy session and he’d managed a couple of words—even if it hurt like hell—before his voice choked off.

“Ignis wanted to check if the burger was okay with you,” he repeated, pointing at it on the menu. Noct took in a deep breath. It was a good day, he could do this.

“Y...y-eah,” he said, wincing at the horrid torn feeling as the quiet word came out. The other three froze. Prompto looked dumbfounded.

“Noct? Did you just...?” The prince couldn’t help but smile weakly at the response as he rubbed at his neck. Damnit, that really hurt, but it was worth it. Gladio clapped a hand on his back in approval.

“It’s good to hear your voice again, Noct,” Ignis said, a warm smile on his face.

The atmosphere around them seemed to shift somewhat as they ate—true, everything was still pretty awful, but for the first time in the week or so since he woke up, it was some kind of improvement.

They’d take that as a small victory.

 

It turned out three and a half weeks was the limit to the first secretary’s hospitality. It was getting increasingly obvious as the days passed that she was eager for them to leave her city, and preparations to secure them safe passage to Niflheim were progressing along. Noctis had been invited for an audience later that day to discuss arrangements. Ignis had been more than insistent on going with him to assist; even though he was most qualified to handle someone of such an important position, it didn’t sit right with him one bit.

By now, he should have been able to handle it on his own. That’s what the doctors had said, right? So then why was he still having so much difficulty speaking more than a few short words at a time?

The others had demanded he go for another check up before the meeting. Noct didn’t even see the point, but he found it pointless to argue. Prompto had taken Ignis for an examination of his own, leaving Gladio for company. His presence put Noctis on edge; Gladio seemed to be fast becoming less and less patient with the prince’s condition with each passing day. There should have been a more noticeable improvement by now...right?

The doctor asked his usual questions, trying to pry a spoken response out of him. Noct was close to grabbing his phone and typing out the responses. His throat hurt worse than usual from trying to cry out after a particularly harrowing nightmare—he was tired and just didn’t want to deal with the usual shtick of managing a couple of words before hacking his lungs out, ending with them prematurely calling it a day.

The doctor looked over Noct’s shoulder to Gladio, who was stood back, arms folded. “Have you noticed any positive changes at all?” he asked, ignoring Noct’s discomfort as he twisted the prince’s head this way and that to examine his neck.

“No changes. Sorry to disappoint.” Noct shrunk in on himself slightly as the doctor’s frown deepened. The word ‘disappoint’ seemed to be popping up more in conversation lately when related to his recovery, and it was starting to wear him down. He didn’t mean to disappoint anyone—every sound he made still hurt, and besides the exercises, it was just less painful to stay quiet, even if it was inconvenient.

He’d made a mistake by speaking that day in the cafe, he just knew it. Now everyone had expectations that he’d be fine; in truth, any improvement he’d made since that day was negligible. The doctor shone a torch down his throat, scribbling down some notes before turning his attention back to the prince. “And you, Highness?” Noct went to shake his head, then paused. No, he needed to say something. What was the point in them taking the time to help him if he never showed anything for it. He drew in a deep breath, remembering what he’d been taught to make things easier.

“St-ill h-urts…” He doubled over slightly at the renewed pain that flared. His hand reached up to his neck as he fought to keep his breath from catching in his throat. This really was the best he could do, even after a month of recovery. _Damnit_. He grit his teeth in frustration. “S...s-orry…”

“It’s quite alright,” the man replied, leaning back in his seat. “I appreciate your effort. Thank you.”

It was almost infuriating how polite and patient the man was. How was he not angry at the lack of progress?! Noct attempted to speak again, to at least acknowledge the man’s words, but it hurt too much to make anything more than a tiny croak. The doctor placed a hand on his shoulder.

“So, I’ve been informed this may very well be our last chance to check up on you. You’ll just have to keep running through the exercises I’ve given you, I’m afraid.” He flipped through his notes, looking to Noctis once more. “Did you want to go over them again?”

Noct shook his head. He’d already committed them to memory since his second session, practising them daily, for as little good as they seemed to be doing. He dreaded to think how bad he’d be without them if this was the best it could do now.

He could feel the disappointment radiating behind him from his shield; he didn’t want to deal with failing further by struggling with his exercises right now.

“Very well. I wish there were more we could do. Best of luck, Highness.” The doctor extended his hand, and Noctis shook it as firmly as he could.

 

“You hit some kind of stumbling block or something? Sounded like you could’ve done with going over those techniques again,” Gladio said offhandedly as he closed the door behind them. Noct let out a breath—intended to be a sigh—as he pulled out his phone and typed. Gladio found his phone as the message sent.

_[Already know them]_

“Uh-huh. Just make sure you’re actually _doing_ them, then.” The accusatory tone in the shield’s voice stabbed through him. Noct scowled, choosing not to snipe back. It wasn’t worth it. Putting his phone away, he shoved his hands into his pockets as they walked in silence for a while. That was, what, maybe the third time Gladio had heard him speak since he woke up a month ago? He sure must’ve been happy to hear _that_ pathetic attempt. Even Prompto had only heard him a few times, trying to coax words from him by pointing out strange slogans on food packaging for him to read out loud. The idea was appreciated, but exhausting. The past couple weeks he had decided it was easier not to talk; he really didn’t want the others to realise he’d reached his peak so soon in his recovery.

“So, you’re meeting with the first secretary in about half an hour, right?” Gladio asked, checking his phone for the time. Noct nodded, pulling his phone out once more—to the disdain of the shield—texting to Prompto and deliberately keeping his line of sight as far from the damage around them as possible as they made their way through the city streets.

He couldn’t wait to get out of this place, to try and clear his mind of everything that had happened. Right now, however, he just wanted to get away from the citizens’ stares and comments that followed him as he passed them by.

 

It was quiet as Noctis and Ignis waited to be called in. Well, almost quiet. The offbeat tapping of Noct’s boots echoed throughout the corridor. The speed changed alongside Noct’s own breathing—Ignis didn’t need to see his charge’s face to know the level of apprehension that hung over him.

“All will be well, Noct. I assure you.” The tapping stopped as Noctis look to Ignis, dumbfounded. It baffled him how he could say something as optimistic as that. He was _blind_ , for crying out loud!

By this point, Noctis was certain there was a lot his advisor was holding back about his sudden disability—trying to relearn things that were once second nature, multiple doctors check ups much like his own, and all while remaining his usual composed, rational self. Noct hadn’t seen him anywhere near as much as he should have done, but he’d heard from Prompto not long before that Ignis’ prognosis was not looking good, and the prince knew it was troubling him. He wanted to ask, he wanted to _know_ . _‘Talk to me anytime, I’m here to listen, I’m here to_ help _,’_ he wanted to say more than anything. Was this why Gladio had declined to wait with them? Noct would have no choice but to talk when he was alone with Ignis, but he just _couldn’t_.

He carefully studied the scars on Ignis’ face, looking away as his stomach turned at the particularly noticeable injuries around his eyes. Perhaps if he’d been strong enough to save Luna, she could have healed him and—

His heart ached at the thought of Luna, but he forced in back with a deep breath. He couldn’t get wrapped up in that again. Not right now. Not when Ignis was right there, _alive_ , and needed support. Noct’s hand balled into a fist, before it relaxed as he raised it up to place on Ignis’ shoulder. It was a simple gesture that Ignis had done many a time to help reassure and ground his prince. He hoped more than anything Ignis understood the thought behind it.

Judging by the smile of the advisor’s face, gentle as he placed a hand over Noct’s own, it was.

“Thank you,” he said quietly. Noct felt warmth from the words. “And have faith. We’ve come this far and survived—doubtless we shall overcome whatever might lie in our way.”

The prince closed his eyes, thinking over the words. Ignis had such faith—he couldn’t understand where it all came from.

Although it wasn’t like they had a choice to halt their journey. As a young assistant stepped through the door to invite them in at last, it became even more painfully clear that they were fast hurtling towards their next move, whether either of them were okay or not.

 

“We have secured travel for you, once you reach Niflheim shores. However, arrangements for passing the borders while keeping your status private have been...cumbersome. I’m afraid it will cost you.”

Noct looked suspicious at the words. They’d only been speaking for a short time, and it seemed the first secretary wanted to get straight to the point.

“And those costs would be?” Ignis asked, his voice even as he mentally dissected her tone of voice for anything suspicious. He knew she loved her people deeply, and was indeed a woman of her word, but circumstances had changed quite a bit since their arrangements for dealing with the Hydrean.

“Let us just say that I hope you have adequate funds at your disposal.” Camelia leant forward, elbows rested on her desk. “There is nothing I can offer you on that front—our resources must remain with the broken lives of the people of Altissia. I’m sure you can understand.”

“Of course,” Ignis said with a nod.

“But,” she continued. “I’m afraid the offer has not been extended to heavier cargo. Your vehicle, for example, will have to remain in our care.”

“N-no...y-ou ca-n’t!”

Ignis and Camelia were startled to attention as Noct had moved forward from his seat, hands planted on the table. She regarded the prince carefully before leaning back. “The first I hear you speak since the rite, and it is out of love for your father’s car. It must be quite precious to you.”

Noct nodded somewhat shakily before slumping back down, a hand subconsciously reaching up to his neck. Damnit, he _really_ shouldn’t have done that, but he couldn’t leave the Regalia behind!

Ignis was stunned for a moment. He hadn’t heard the prince speak in what must have been two weeks now. Prompto had assured him he was still working hard with his recovery, but to hear his voice now—so pained, so _broken_ —was the damage really so extensive that he was still struggling so much, even now?

Pushing his darkened glasses further up his nose, his expression became one of composure once more. “Noct, I understand your distress, but we must be reasonable.”

“No, it’s quite alright,” Camelia said, lacing her fingers together, her face unreadable. “I shall see what I can do. I’m afraid such a request shall prove even more costly, however.” She focused on Noct. “I take it that this is acceptable?”

Noctis merely nodded. He knew he was asking far more than he had any right to, but after everything else, he couldn’t leave the last piece he had of his dad behind.

“Very well. I’ll send word and arrange what I can,” she said, standing to approach them. “I wish you safe travels, King Noctis.”

“We are indebted to you for all your aid. You have our thanks,” Ignis spoke with a bow. Noct shook her hand, joining Ignis in bowing slightly in thanks—a strange gesture from royalty, but better than staying silent—and guided the advisor out of the room.

It was a few minutes of walking before Ignis finally spoke.

“That was...quite the display, Noct,” he said, still somewhat taken back as he altered the grip on his cane. He’d only received it a couple of weeks prior, and learning how to properly utilise it was proving quite the learning curve.

Noct looked around sheepishly, hand tensing on Ignis’ back as he guided him. He’d sounded like a petulant child before the first secretary. All things considered, she should have outright refused him such a request. He was just thankful she’d humoured him. He let out a breath; Ignis wouldn’t be able to see his response, but he needed to apologise.

“S...s-or—” _Ow_ , that hurt. A few small coughs left him, and he could feel Ignis’ hand on his back.

“There’s no need to apologise,” he said gently. “As blunt as the delivery may have been, we shall still have the Regalia with us. I would call that a success.” Ignis paused for a moment, considering his next words carefully. “I…take it that using your voice still pains you, somewhat.” It was an obvious statement, and to the point as expected, but Noctis still found something much gentler to it than Gladio’s increasingly biting tone. He mentally thanked the advisor. “You’re doing well Noct. I’m sure you will recover soon.” Noctis’ attention drew to the apprehensive frown that betrayed Ignis’ optimism. It hurt to see him so unsure, so helpless compared to his old self. But without words, there was little he could do to offer his support.

As they carried on to meet the others, there was much buzzing through Noct’s mind. There was so much more he wanted to apologise to Ignis for, besides his childish tantrum. Hopefully that would wait until he could finally say the words for himself.

 

They met up with Prompto and Gladio outside of the ministerial building. Prompto immediately bombarded the prince with questions; an arm draped around his shoulders, eagerly awaiting each of Noct’s noncommittal responses from his phone about the meeting as they walked ahead. Gladio grumbled under his breath.

“Something troubling you?” Ignis asked discreetly.

“I swear, he’s never gonna get better if he doesn’t try _saying_ anything.”

So, Noct was on his phone again. It was no real surprise—from the way he had sounded during the meeting, it seemed like he had resorted to relying on his phone for conversation. True, it was an excellent idea, but no real substitute for actually speaking; especially when he himself couldn’t read the messages.

“This hasn’t been easy for him, Gladio, what with the rite causing such damage and Lady Lunafreya’s passing, among everything else.” There was a hell of a lot lumped into the ‘everything else’, but none of it beared repeating. “Surely you know that,” he added with a sigh.

“And that’s a good enough reason to keep avoiding it?”

Gladio had a point. Ignis wanted to tell him to give Noct more time. But time had already passed—beyond the original prognosis—and from what he could tell, the prince’s condition hadn’t improved since the first week or so...and neither had Ignis’. It left a heavy feeling in his stomach; they didn’t have _time_ for all this—didn’t have time to deal with two of their party members handicapped—they needed to collect the royal arms and face the empire. _Together_. They’d...just have to make do. “Let’s just support him however we can.” Gladio remained silent, continuing to watch Noctis from behind as they carried on walking back to the hotel.

 

Time was passing too quickly. Noct cursed himself for wanting to leave Altissia and the horrid memories of what transpired there behind; as their day of departure drew near, he sorely needed more time. As the days inched on, he could feel a bubble of panic well up gradually within him.

Deep breaths. Just breathe. Focus on the exercises, just like always.

_Breathe_.

Eventually, everything felt like it had settled, even if it was just a little. He coughed a couple of times, hoping to clear his lungs, trying to ignore the twinge in his throat as he yawned. He felt exhausted—the few days leading up to their departure day had somehow felt more awful than before. He wasn’t even sure how much sleep he’d managed to get; closing his eyes lately only resulted in nightmares he’d rather not think about.

He was somewhat accustomed to the nightmares that quite often manifested at night by now; of the rite, of Insomnia’s fall, of the people who got hurt— _or died_ —because of him. But starting just a few nights before, things were so much different. It was as if someone had taken every anxiety, every fear and doubt in his mind, and given them life as twisted images unfolding before his eyes. He had stepped out onto the balcony, hoping the fresh air would help soothe his mind. He had no such luck.

Before, he was able to tune out his dreams of times past. But these new visions were of the future, of events yet to come, events he _had_ to face. His friends’ mutilated bodies lay dead upon the ground. The most important people left in his life, captured. Tortured. _Killed_. Throwing their lives away in the name of a king who couldn’t even scream out their names as they left him alone, the world upon his shoulders.

In a few hours, they would be setting sail, ready to face the empire.

He wanted to be ready. He feared he never would be.

Pacing back inside the room briefly to pick up his and Luna’s notebook, he resumed his seat overlooking the waters, bracing himself as he opened the book to the first blank page, swallowing painfully as he caught sight of the sylleblossom that lay pressed within its pages.

He held the pen in his hand, poised over the page. He needed to talk about this somehow—to try and let his thoughts escape. Maybe...if he wrote it as a letter to Luna? It seemed like such a silly idea. ‘Hi Luna, I know you’re dead and all, but I’ve been going through some stuff.’ Noct let out a silent sigh at the thought. Who was he kidding, he was never good at writing down his thoughts. In twelve years, he couldn’t figure out how to even _start_ writing down his confusing muddle of emotions to the young Oracle. How was he supposed to manage it now?

He tried, again and again, over the course of a few hours, scribbling out each attempt, wishing he could just yell and vent some of his frustration— _any_ of it. It didn’t matter how many pages he wasted in inky scribbles now anyway, it wasn’t like there would be any more messages from his childhood friend waiting for him inside. He stalled at the thought, before continuing in vain, eventually retiring back to his bed to attempt sleep once more before the others woke up.

 

Prompto and Noctis sat in the foyer, waiting for Ignis and Gladio. The blond regarded his friend quietly, watching him play a mobile game he’d recommended a couple of months back. It was a good simple game to play, especially if your head felt a little spacey. And judging by the tired look in the prince’s eyes and the sluggish attack responses as he tapped the screen, it was exactly the kind of game he needed.

He racked his brain to think of what could be wrong—aside from the obvious—but came up short. He could only conclude that things had slowly declined within the prince since his meeting with the first secretary. Had something been said? He’d have to ask Ignis about it.

But on that worried note, was he sleeping okay? Prompto had noticed his appetite had lessened the past few days, maybe he was nervous? Would he admit it if Prompto were to ask?

He was pretty sure the answer to that was no. It didn’t hurt to try though.

“So...you doing okay?” He leaned closer, attempting to act casual, continuing to watch the game. Noct glanced to the side briefly, nodding. Prompto bit the inside of his lip as he thought. Yes or no questions were far too easy to be vague with, he had to change his wording. “So like, what kind of ‘okay’ are we talking? Is your throat ‘okay’? Or did you sleep ‘okay’? Come on, help me out here.”

Noct rolled his eyes and flipped over to the messenger app.

_[I’m fine. Stop worrying]_

“See, now ‘fine’ is a _really_ vague word.” The sight of Noct smacking his hand into his face, running it down his features, would’ve been hilarious usually. Prompto just took it as another wall his friend had managed to build up around himself. The blond sighed. “ _Fine_ then. How’s the game so far?” The app closed and a few seconds of typing later, his phone buzzed.

_[It’s fun. Kinda tricky, but just what I needed]_

That sounded like a somewhat accidental admission that he wasn’t alright; maybe Prompto could act on it. “Listen, Noct—”

They both looked up suddenly at the familiar voices from the floor above, as Gladio began to help Ignis down the stairs. Prompto jumped up to help, his previous thought lost for the moment. As they got to the bottom, Gladio wrinkled his nose at the sight of Noct idly playing on his phone before darting his eyes away once more. It didn’t pass by the blond. Neither did the way Noct hunched over slightly, as if he could sense the glare. It left a bad feeling in the pit of Prompto’s stomach.

“We’re almost done, just gotta get a few more supplies before we head off,” Gladio said, mentally going over what they already had.

“And then across the sea and into Niflheim,” Ignis said, voice low. “How I wish I were able to see the land for myself.” Prompto felt a little pull in his chest at the words, turning to face Ignis fully.

“I’ll describe it for you, how about that?” he suggested with a small laugh. “After all, I’ve got a photographer’s eye for detail, right?” A smile caught the edges of Ignis’ mouth.

“Thank you, Prompto. That is most kind.”

“What _would_ be kind is getting you someplace safe instead,” Gladio said, his tone deadly serious. “We’re heading into enemy territory—we don’t know what’s gonna be waiting for us. We can’t babysit _two_ of you, all it takes is for us to get too caught up with the wrong enemy and—”

“I’m well aware, Gladio, but I simply cannot stay when—” Rushed footsteps caught his attention. Prompto looked around curiously.

“Iggy? What’s...up?” He turned around, spotting a key difference. “Where’s Noct?”

“It sounds as if he’s gone,” Ignis replied, somewhat perplexed.

Gladio ran a hand over his face, exasperated. “I swear if that kid doesn’t get his act together soon…” He sighed. “Let’s just finish things up here quick. He won’t go far.”

 

Noct grimaced as he paced briskly down the waterfront. Hearing the others talk about the danger they were throwing themselves into was the last thing he needed—he already had the images from his nightmares burnt into the back of his mind to remind him of that. They were all so willing, ready to follow him to the ends of Eos for a Crystal that might not even be able to save them. The thought made his head ache; he needed some fresh air. Making his way past citizens who were busying themselves repairing paving and preparing their shops for business once more with limited merchandise, he walked out onto one of the few undamaged secluded piers, looking out onto the calming crystalline waters before him. From this part of the city, it was almost as if nothing had happened.

How he wished that was the case.

Today was the day, as much as he wished it wasn’t. He was so tired, fatigue had settled deep into his bones and fogged his mind over the days he’d been unable to sleep. Focusing on anything was harder that it should have been; he knew he couldn’t lead like this. What good would he be in Niflheim if he couldn’t even concentrate? The others would be struck down trying to protect him in no time at all.

He didn’t _want_ to be protected—he didn’t want them anywhere near this—but they’d all made their vow, and he knew they’d find him foolish for trying to make them stay.

Maybe if he could wear the ring, he could prove himself strong enough that he didn’t need them to follow him. At the thought of the black metal sat in his pocket, his stomach turned, remembering in his nightmares the image of the Ring of the Lucii’s power tearing him to shreds. He couldn’t face it. Not yet.

He just more needed time. But time had never really been on his side.

Leaning on the wooden fencing of the pier, he watched the water ripple, becoming lost in its rhythm as he felt his eyelids grow heavy. He wasn’t even sure how long he’d been there as the sun traced its way lazily across the sky. Maybe Maybe sleeping in the daytime would be easier. He sorely needed it. Allowing his eyes to close, he focused on the sound of the water.

“Hey, you’re the prince, right?”

Noct’s eyes snapped open as he spun around to see a young man stood barely a few metres from him. To say he didn’t look happy was an understatement.

“Thought as much.” He seemed to have taken Noct’s reaction as confirmation as the prince watched him cautiously. “So—” He stepped forward; Noct had no room to back away. “—You really think no one’s noticed the Crown Prince of Lucis skulking around, standing by while the people caught up in _your_ mess’ve worked day and night to rebuild their lives? This is one of the better areas, y’know!”

And yet everything was still upturned and flooded. Noct dreaded to think what the other areas looked like. He remained still, barely taking his eyes from the man as people began to gather round, murmuring curiously between themselves.

“Our city is in ruins and our Oracle is _dead_.” The man spat at the ground. “I hope the Tidemother’s blessing was worth it.” Noctis kept his gaze steady. “Well? Say something!”

Say what? Even if he could speak, what could he possible say? There had to be _something_ , he had so much to apologise for. He was practically forced away from anything physically taxing, made to rest up before he even considered trying to aid anyone else. But that was no excuse. He should have tried harder.

_“_ I...I’m s-orry—I d-di— _”_ Shit, his throat felt like it was tearing itself apart. He coughed hard, trying to force his throat to clear, wincing as what felt like a wave of fire shot through it. The man’s focus seemed to shift to the scarring that ran across Noct’s neck, lesser damage reaching up the side of his cheek.

“So, you got hurt too, huh?” The young man stepped even closer. “ _Good_ .” He grabbed Noctis by the shirt, pulling him forwards and closing the distance, his other hand balled into a fist. “What a pity, I was looking forward to hearing you _scream_ . Guess I’ll have to make do.” Noct could see the intensity—the _anger_ —in his eyes. He didn’t have any right to try and fight back. Shoulders sagging, he closed his eyes, waiting for the blows to land among the cries of concern and yells of encouragement filling the air.

Another voice from nearby spoke up. “Raph, maybe you should—”

“No ‘maybe’ about it, _bud_.” A familiar voice growled as Noct opened his eyes to see Gladio; his sturdy hand on the man named Raph’s shoulder, fingers tensed. “Let go. Move along, and I won’t have to do anything.” The man looked panicked at the size of the shield before him, releasing his grip on Noct’s shirt and shoving his hands into his pockets as he walked of, cursing the prince under his breath. The rest of the crowd quickly dispersed as Gladio cast a look around at everyone. They’d long outstayed their welcome; it was time to go.

Noct looked hesitantly at him, seeing once more a quiet anger settled in his eyes. “Head to the dock and get on the boat,” Gladio said, his tone low and commanding. He kept his gaze pointedly away from the prince. “Prompto and Iggy are waiting.”

The shield walked off towards the dock as Noct cast around a finally look at the people who were still watching cautiously. Turning his attention to Gladio as he walked away, the panicked feeling in his chest rose again; time was up.

Taking in a deep unsteady breath, he set off towards the boat.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't thank you guys enough for the wonderful comments and kudos on chapter 1!! <3 I really hope you'll all enjoy the conclusion to this fic, it was a lot of fun to write, and heartbreaking too :'D
> 
> Sidenote, I edited this at almost 2am so please forgive me if something doesn't read quite right. I think I picked up on everything, but who knows? xD
> 
> Anyways, onto the finale!

The train ride felt dishearteningly lonely, despite the fact that the four of them were travelling together. Prompto attempted to keep conversation going, but no one had much energy or patience for it. Gladio seemed to have a chip on his shoulder about something and had wandered off somewhere, Ignis was what Prompto could only describe as quietly contemplative, merely acknowledging statements but not much more, and Noct kept drifting off to sleep, only to be jolted awake by the train’s movements barely minutes later. The entire experience was thoroughly miserable, and Prompto had no idea how to remedy any of it.

Casting a quick look at Noct, he spied his friend’s eyes to be heavy lidded, but not closed. “You tried just lying down on the seat, dude? It’s gotta be less painful than what you’re doing right now.” The prince cast him an almost dazed side glance—clearly he’d just been rudely awoken once more—before reaching for his phone.

_[Thanks, but it’s fine.Can’t sleep anyway]_

“If you say so,” Prompto responded with a shrug. “But you _really_ look like you could use it.” Ignis perked up at the comment.

“Are you still not sleeping well, Noct?” he asked, a concern lacing his voice that Prompto was more than familiar with in regards to Noctis. Prompto noticed Noct’s posture alter as he tensed up, typing again.

_[Tell Iggy I’m fine. Don’t worry him like that]_

“He says he’s fine,” Prompto relayed. Naturally, Ignis didn’t believe him, but that was to be expected. The blond couldn’t help but feel a twinge of guilt at Noct’s comment, but Ignis had already been made aware of his charge’s seemingly exhausted state, why shouldn’t he mention it?

Sighing, he stretched, relief washing over him as stiff joints cracked. It was silent again for a long while, only interrupted by occasional half-hearted conversation as Prompto prodded Noct into messaging him. It must’ve seemed bizarre to the other passengers; Prompto hoped they didn’t think he was talking to himself, but that was a small concern compared to getting his friend to talk. Noct’s constant state of tiredness had him keeping to himself a lot more lately. Prompto was steadfast in avoiding that turning into something even more concerning.

Time continued to pass with no conversation or movement. Prompto watched as Noct rhythmically picked at one of the buckles on the back of his glove, a gentle thud with each motion. He then caught sight of one of the travel magazines scattered about.

“So…” he began, remembering the train route he’d studied before they boarded. “We’re gonna roll through Tenebrae.”

“Not before visiting the royal tomb in Cartanica,” Ignis corrected.

“Ah, right.” Prompto hesitated. “Are you sure you’re up for that?”

“The wounds have mended. Eyesight’s a matter of time.”

There was a heavy doubt hanging in the air at those words. From what the doctors had said, the best case scenario was partial sight returning, but even that seemed like wishful thinking. Prompto couldn’t even imagine how hard it would be to accept that his sight might never return.

“Yeah...” he replied with a smile, albeit hesitantly, before turning his attention to Noct. The prince seemed keen to keep his focus on the phone held in his tense hands. It was probably a good idea to change the subject. “So Noct, what’s Tenebrae like? I’ve seen photos, but I bet it’s even more beautiful in person.”

It seemed to work. Prompto could see some of the tension dissolve from Noct’s body as he closed his eyes, a small fond smile tugging at the corners of his lips. The blond knew that his friend’s reason for going to Tenebrae—and for leaving so soon—were less than pleasant, but it was still spoken of fondly whenever Noct had recalled it. As he watched the prince begin to type on his phone once more, footsteps were heard approaching.

“Or you could _tell_ him, for once.” Noct glanced up at Gladio’s words, before returning to his message. A frustrated growl left the shield’s throat—he slammed his hand onto the backrest of Noct’s seat. “So, what? Are you not even _trying_ anymore?”

“Gladio…” Ignis said warningly, fingers tensing around his cane.

“And what about that ring, huh?” Gladio continued, ignoring him. “You think staying a mute means you don’t have to be king? She sacrificed her life so you could do your duty, and you’re holding yourself back so you don’t have to deal with it?!”

Oh gods, this was looking bad. Prompto’s stomach churned as Noct was forcing himself to keep his eyes low, trying to focus on anything but the shield’s words as he continued to type. It really wasn’t a good time for this!

“Stop hiding behind your damn phone!” Gladio hissed, snatching it from Noct’s hands. A choked sound of surprise escaped him as he jumped to his feet, just as Prompto had done the same.

“G-ive it—” Noct managed to say, frustratingly quiet, one hand near his throat and the other one attempting to reach out and grab the device back.

“Is that all you got?” The shield held the phone higher, in plainer view. “Remember this. One screw up, and this thing is _gone_ . And then what? You’ve got nothing because you _won’t even try_.”

Was he going to break the phone?! “ _Stop!_ ” Prompto squeaked, moving closer on reflex to grab hold of Gladio’s arm, trying to get the device back.

“Gladio, for goodness sake, stop this!” Ignis said forcefully. The shield froze as the situation began to sink in, the passengers’ eyes on the group suddenly obvious. He lowered his arm, and after a few seconds, hesitantly offered the phone back to its owner. Noct stared at him, wide eyed, taking a couple of uncertain steps back before racing down the carriage, ignoring the phone completely.

“Noct!” Gladio called after him, tensing up with his hands clenched. The passengers were whispering all around them, adults voicing their thoughts and young children scared by the shouting.

“What the hell was that?!” Prompto demanded.

“You’ll have to enlighten me as to what your plan was there, Gladio,” Ignis said darkly. Gladio drew in a deep breath, scowling, before throwing the phone onto the now empty seat and storming off in the other direction.

Prompto was left in the middle of the isle, head darting to either end of the carriage, mind racing. He should go after Noct, right? But then Ignis would be alone and Gladio was gone and—

“Prompto?” Ignis’ voice cut through his inner monologue as he looked to the advisor. “Deep breaths. I can hear how panicked you are.”

Right. Yeah. Deep breaths. The rush of air caused his head to spin. He grabbed Noct’s phone from the seat and sat back down, next to Ignis. “Sorry,” he said meekly.

“No need.” Ignis’ voice sounded level once more, yet there was a slight tension that was setting the blond further on edge. That display was bad enough to witness, it must’ve been awful not being able to see what was happening and being unable to properly intervene. Silence passed for a moment, before Ignis cleared his throat, catching Prompto’s attention. “I know you wish to find Noct,” he said plainly. “He’s nowhere to go beyond these carriages, but I would rest easier knowing someone is with him.”

“But what about you?” Prompto asked. He really didn’t want to leave Ignis on his own, especially after all that, but his options were limited.

“I’ll meet with you at the train station,” Ignis said with a reassuring smile.

“Right…” The blond still hesitated, but paced off down the aisle. He couldn’t help playing the scene over in his head as he walked.

 

Prompto scoured the carriages, trying to find his friend, but found nothing besides passengers keeping to themselves. Even the sleeping cabins held no sign of life from the prince. Further and further back through the train he went, until he reached the door to the cargo space.

_Of course he’d be here_ , Prompto thought as he headed through the dimly lit area. Boxes were piled up, haphazardly placed around, but at the very back, a lone car waited. And as Prompto peered through the window, he found Noctis sat in the back seat, hands clasped tight on his lap as he hunched forward. Prompto was thankful the doors were unlocked, letting himself in and sliding besides Noct as the prince jumped, surprised by the blond’s sudden appearance.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle ya,” Prompto said with an apologetic smile. He shuffled about a little, settling into the seat. “So...how are you doing?” Noct scrunched his eyes, tensing up.

“F...f-ine,” he managed, gritting his teeth and sucking in a breath. The words caught Prompto off guard—although he didn’t believe them for a minute—before he remembered the phone sat in his pocket.

“Oh yeah, here you go.” He handed Noct the phone, watching as the prince stared at it distastefully, taking the device and pocketing it seconds later. “I’m guessing you don’t wanna talk then,” the blond said nervously. “That’s okay, we can just relax for a while.”

A few minutes of silence passed as the two were rocked by the movements of the train. “Wh-ere are...th...the othe-ers?” The blond almost jumped out of his skin at the sudden sound, moving over to rub Noct’s back as the young prince began to cough.

“They said they’d be waiting for us at the station,” Prompto said once he’d settled down. He didn’t want to tell Noct about Gladio storming off—he was pretty sure they _would_ bump into him again when the train reached its destination. Noct merely nodded in response, letting out a pained breath as he rubbed his neck. “You’ve got your phone back, y’know. How about using that? Take a load off or something.” Noct shook his head this time, and the argument came back to mind, alongside a horrible feeling that settled in the pit of his stomach.

Silence descended once more as the two of them were seemingly lost in their own worlds. It was only when the train shuddered to a halt that they broke away from their thoughts. The tannoy system alerted them to their destination. “Well Noct,” Prompto said with a nervous laugh. “Ready to go?”

 

The sun was already beginning to dip in the sky as they met up with Ignis and eventually Gladio on the station platform. It was decided they’d rest up and start fresh when daylight was on their side; however much that would be, seeing as the sun seemed unusually eager to leave them quite early in the evening.

The remaining evening was tense as hell, as they ate a particularly awful meal at the stationary diner—with Gladio staying suspiciously AWOL—and attempted awkward conversation that never really amounted to anything. Noct was just thankful for a little extra time before heading off; he didn’t know why, it wasn’t like things were going to magically fix themselves in the space of a night.

They hadn’t in almost four weeks, after all.

As the evening crawled on, Noct really didn’t want to sleep. Sleep was pretty damn awful lately, there was way too much opportunity to think about everything that had and could go wrong. But his body and mind ached for some kind of rest, so he weakly excused himself after barely touching his food, crawling into bed and hoping his mind would blank as he slept.

It was wishful thinking. Letting out a long frustrated breath as sleep refused to come, he pulled the covers from over his head, straining his ears as he heard voices.

_“...you don’t have to. I can watch you_ and _Noct, I swear!”_ It was Prompto.

_“You shouldn’t_ have _to be the one to watch over us.”_ Ignis.

_“Yeah I know, but—”_

_“Things may not have been...ideal lately, but—”_ Ignis’ voice hushed. _“ —personal feelings aside, Gladio still has a duty to attend to._ ”

_“He’s...staying in a different cabin, right?”_ Prompto sounded nervous. _“I can stay with him and you can stay with Noct, if you want. I bet he’d enjoy your company.”_

_“The offer is appreciated, Prompto, but...I’m afraid as things are currently, there is little I can do for him on my own.”_ A pause. _“There is little I can do for anyone, presently.”_ He sounded so dejected as he confessed.

_“Things are gonna take some getting used to. Let's see how tomorrow goes, right?”_

_“Yes...you're right. Goodnight, Prompto.”_

_“G’night.”_ The door to the cabin next to Noct’s opened—Prompto was probably leading Ignis to it—before his own cabin door creaked open and Noct forced himself to remain completely still, curled up in his bedsheets as his heart pounded in his ears. Prompto must have thought him asleep, as he could hear the blond shuffle around as quietly as possible before climbing into bed.

The words Ignis spoke raced through Noct’s mind. He was glad the man was confiding in someone, but hearing it was like a stab to the chest. It was because of his rite that Ignis was blind; he should be trying harder, he _had_ to. Ignis needed his support, not to feel even more alienated.

He’d do better tomorrow. He had no choice.

 

Morning came—if it could be called that, with the way the sun lazily rose above the horizon line—and preparations were underway ready for their departure into the Fodina Caestino Mine. Noctis was happier than he should’ve been that Gladio seemed to be ignoring him; he was exhausted from another restless night of worst case scenarios and other panicked thoughts invading his mind, only multiplied by the conversation he’d overheard.

He spied Ignis sat on one of the benches by the lift shaft—probably there on Gladio’s orders. Seeing the advisor sat aside, when once he was the one at the forefront of preparations, was something Noctis didn’t want to get used to. Ignis could still plan—could still _think_ —it wasn’t fair to leave him out because he couldn’t see.

Noct’s boots thudded against the walkway and Ignis turned to face his direction. “Noct?” he asked, sighing with relief as a hand rested on his shoulder, before smiling fondly. “I thought I recognised your gait.” He went quiet, and Noct’s thoughts wandered back to that conversation once more. He was pretty sure today was going to hurt like hell, but he had little choice.

“H-ow a...are you?” Damnit, when would his voice sound remotely _normal_ again? And when would it stop hurting? He grimaced, before turning back to look at Ignis, whose face seemed to have lit up a little at the words. The pain was somewhat forgotten at the realisation that Ignis looked genuinely happy to hear him speak.

“I’m...I’m quite alright, Noct. Thank you,” the man replied, somewhat taken back. “All things considered. And how have you been holding up? Is speaking any easier now?”

_No, it really isn’t_. He couldn’t say that though, it’d just worry everyone. They had far worse things to worry about than his stupid voice. “I-it’s fi-ne…” Didn’t sound fine as he said it, but it’d have to do.

“Good to hear,” Ignis said with a warm smile. “Please remember to take it easy, however. The damage was quite extensive, we best not run before we can walk.”

“Y...y-eah.”

Ow. Okay, maybe that was enough of that for now. He’d have to save his voice for when they got to the mines. Massaging his neck, he looked towards the sounds of heavy footsteps as Gladio and Prompto approached.

“All set,” he said plainly, as they all headed to the elevator. Gladio protested Ignis coming along, of course, but on Ignis’ insistence that he didn’t travel this far to remain on the sidelines and with Prompto’s somewhat nervous back up, the shield seemed to back down. Noct wanted Ignis there too, he hoped that much was obvious. Wanted Ignis to feel a part of things again, in whatever way possible.

He just hoped they wouldn’t regret it.

 

This was a bad idea. Granted, leaving Ignis behind simply wasn’t an option, but seeing him stumble about and failing to adapt to the uneven surfaces left a taste of guilt in his mouth he couldn’t be rid of.

And that wasn’t even including the nagging feeling of disappointment he was getting as Gladio kept his eye on him and commenting under his breath that Ignis shouldn’t have come.

He’d admit though, as rundown and dangerous as this area was, and on top of everything else, the humid air in the mines was actually...kind of nice. It was muggy and by all accounts should have felt awful, but his throat hadn’t felt this easy in weeks. At least the place had _something_ going for it.

They followed the path down, Noct moving slightly ahead to scope the place out. He thought he’d heard something—a small cluster of gurangatch wandering about the murky waters. Nothing too much for them to—

“Hey, you wanna try keeping the royal procession together?” Gladio’s voice was sharp, accusing. Noct would have sworn the man was looking for a fight. He turned and jabbed his thumb in the direction of the water.

“Ene—enem-ies,” he said, cringing as his voice cracked. He’d hoped talking would be easier down here. Gladio and Prompto summoned their weapons.

“Right. Stay back Iggy, we got this.” One those words, Gladio lunged off into battle. Noct was fast to join them, summoning his sword and warping off before Ignis could protest. Ignis could still do much to help, but fighting wasn’t on the list.

It wasn’t a tough fight. Then again, nothing could really compare with fighting the _gods themselves_ , but it certainly didn’t feel as easy as it should have done. Noct was short on breath after just a few attacks, narrowly avoiding a couple of the creatures before they could sink their teeth into him. Gladio sliced the final one in half as Noct stumbled back to dry land, hands on his knees as his heart raced.

He jolted as Prompto clapped a hand on his shoulders. “You okay, dude? You can hang back, y’know.”

“I...it’s fi-ine,” Noct gasped out painfully, straightening himself. Ignis was hovering around, his hand finding Noct’s arm as Gladio grunted.

“You’re getting rusty,” the shield said, letting his sword dissolve away. “Don’t tire yourself out so easily, we can’t always pick up after you in battle.”

“I kn...kno—” A strained set of coughs forced their way from his lungs. “—kn-ow that!” Gods, he couldn’t even sound _pissed_ with his voice like this. The dull ache in his throat was almost constant by this point, but he had to stay focused on the task at hand. As they set off further into the depths of the mines, he remained tense. He’d do better. He’d fight better, make his voice better. He’d learn to be a better king.

Somehow.

The thoughts washed away as he winced, a twinge shooting through his neck. His throat felt like he’d been gargling with industrial strength sandpaper; so much for the humid air being better for him, all it was doing now was making him feel even more exhausted.

 

“Nothing but a giant roadblock,” Gladio grumbled, looking up at the mining equipment that stood before them.

“Ironic for a vehicle,” Prompto added.

Ignis thought for a second. “If we get its motor running, perhaps we can move it out of the way.”

So it was a control panel they were looking for. Right. No problem. As they turned to head back, Noct caught Ignis as he lost his footing on the slippery ground. “Y—you okay?”

“I’m fine. Thank you, Noct,” Ignis said gratefully. Gladio hung back as Prompto moved to assist Ignis once more.

“So, you fallen out with your phone or something?” the shield asked as Noct started to follow. Noct paused and turned around, studying the man cautiously, the deep frown on his face, the way he couldn’t even seem to look him in the eye, but said nothing as he carried on.

 

The controls failed. Go figure. This entire place felt like a mess of backtracking; everywhere looked the same, and a light drizzle had started to come down, just adding to the miserable atmosphere that lingered over the group. The trails felt never ending and—were they even going the right way anymore? Noct couldn’t tell by this point. He darted off ahead, ignoring the usual complaints from Gladio, spying some shelving nearby, with falxfangs lurking around.

“Hey! Are you even listening?” He could hear the shield calling after him, sounding more angered by the second.

“Sh—shut up a...a sec. It’s h-ere,” he gasped out. Oh gods, this was getting harder. His phone was looking more tempting by the second. But he wouldn’t get better if he kept using that.

The other three approached and analysed the situation. Only a half dozen falxfangs from the looks of it. It seemed simple enough—take them out, then grab the key. No sweat.

It wasn’t a massive area to warp around in. Go too far one way and you fell over the battered railings, too far the other and you’d run straight into the huts and other abandoned equipment lying around the area.

They managed well enough—when Gladio wasn’t chastising Ignis for attempting a few swings at the creatures and Prompto wasn’t fretting. They took out half of the falxfangs fairly quickly. Noct took a hit, colliding with some fencing. He drew in a sharp breath, throwing a dagger into the throat of the creature that had pounced at him. Glancing up, he saw one of the remaining beasts with its eyes on Prompto, starting to make it’s move from behind the gunner.

“ _Prom—!!_ ” His shout choked off, it felt like something had clamped tightly around his throat. It hurt— _oh gods, it hurt_ . He couldn’t cough, couldn’t _breathe_ . He stumbled, his back hit into something, sending a shock through his body. He heard gunshots, voices. What was going on? What was happening to him, _what was wrong?!_

“Noct!” Prompto’s voice sounded strange in his ears. “Come on man, breathe, it’s okay!”

It didn’t _feel_ okay; the blond’s almost frantic voice wasn’t helping any. He fought to drag air into his lungs, wheezing as it came out in short gasps. That was...something, right? A hand was on his back, his own hands falling limp to the...ground? When did he get so close to the ground?

“Noct, are you alright?” Ignis’ voice sounded a little more normal than Prompto’s, but his vision drifted as everything shifted around him. He had to answer, he _needed_ to answer. He couldn’t. Damnit, he _couldn’t_ —it hurt too much. Curling up on himself, he could feel the damp earth against the top of his head.

“Shit, is your voice gone? Quick, use your phone,” Prompto said hurriedly, reaching into his pocket to find it for him. Noct merely shook his head. Another attempt at speaking only made what could only be described as a strained whine before he gave up. The blond looked worriedly at the others.

“Prompto, grab the key,” Gladio instructed. “I saw a haven not far from here. We’re going, _now_.” Noct didn’t have the energy to argue, his head felt weirdly light, the fire in his throat the only thing giving him something grounding to really focus on. Gladio half assisted, half dragged the prince to the glowing runes as he stumbled on the slick ground, forcing him to sit down on the cooler as he got to work.

It felt just like when he’d first woken up in Altissia. This couldn’t be happening—he couldn’t be back to square one! His chest tightened at the thought, throat aching with each sharp breath through gritted teeth.

“Iggy, we got this. Just stay back.” Noct looked up at Gladio’s words, the agonizing sight of Ignis trying to do something— _anything_ —that they would have gladly relied on him for in the past. He looked so lost, being told to sit it all out when before he’d so readily start preparing a meal for everyone whilst everything else was set up.

Noct continued to watch distractedly as Ignis was guided to one of the now unfolded chairs, guilt rising up in his stomach. Ignis was still trying so hard, and here he was, messing everything up.

“You’re better now, right?” His attention snapped back to Gladio, who was waving him over, face unreadable. “You can help sort the food.”

He wasn’t sure about ‘better’, but the least he could do was help out.

 

Dinner was pretty awful. Canned beans, warmed up not so elegantly by Noctis. It was passable, but served as yet another reminder of what Ignis couldn’t do. Noct kept to himself, idly tapping his spoon against the edge of the can as he forced each mouthful down despite the protests from his throat and stomach. He soon retired to bed, wanting to get away from the tense atmosphere and to try and forget about everything for just a few minutes.

It did, however, hold the unfortunate issue that he had to pretend he couldn’t hear the other three discussing the day’s events, mostly about him. In the quiet of the early evening, their hushed tones seeped into the tent.

He was thankful it wasn’t long before they decided to call it a day. Noct had his back turned, facing away from the others, so for all they knew he was sound asleep, rather than having a constant whirlwind of thoughts making it hard to concentrate on anything. He waited until everything was quiet before finally grabbing his phone and opening a game, hoping it would help.

Minutes later, his phone buzzed with a message. He couldn’t help but scowl.

_ <You still up? Everything ok?> _

Of course Prompto wouldn’t be asleep yet. Damnit. He went back to playing his game.

_ <I know your phone’s on dude, I can see your screen lit up. Come on, type to me> _

He really didn’t want to do this.The thought of saying anything felt like a downward spiral of thoughts and emotions he didn’t dare touch upon. He had to make things right, not drag his friends into his own little chasm of self-pity.

_ <I’m here for you noct. You know that, right?> _

He tensed up, feeling something shudder through him that threatened to prick at the corner of his eyes. Why couldn’t Prompto just leave him alone?!

_‘Because he’s your friend, you idiot. If you don’t want him to worry, stop making him worry.’_

Letting out a shaky breath, he began to type.

 

Prompto was sure Noct wasn’t asleep. Well, pretty sure. His friend didn’t have the best track record with sleeping lately, and he didn’t think anything would change after today. So he’d decided to keep an eye out for a while as the others drifted off to sleep. It wasn’t like he could sleep anyway, and they _were_ friends, so it wasn’t like watching over him was creepy or anything. He lay on his back, head tilted in Noct’s direction, watching the prince’s form move ever so slightly with each breath. It would’ve been a calming sight, had Prompto actually believed he was asleep.

He lost track of time as he continued his silent watch, starting to feel his eyes grow heavy until—

A dim light shone as Noct’s phone screen turned on, sending a small burst of renewed energy through the blond. So he _was_ still awake, just as he’d thought. The colour and intensity of the light flickered; he was probably playing a game. Picking up his own phone from beside him, he sent a message.

No response. Should have figured.

Another message, and again, nothing. Why did his friend have to be so stubborn?! Sending one more message, he sighed, closing his eyes. Merely seconds away from prodding his friend, his phone buzzed.

_[I’m fine. Go to sleep]_

Yeah, like he was going to believe that.

_ <Not really sleepy. And it’s ok to not be fine yknow. A lots happened> _

Prompto was sure he could hear Noct’s breathing getting sharper. Tense minutes passed before another buzz.

_[Sorry]_

That wasn’t the response he was expecting. Casting a quick glance at the prince’s back, he looked back to his phone.

_ <Sorry for what? You mean today? You couldn’t help that> _

Moments passed.

_[I’m not trying hard enough]_

Prompto was thankful for autocorrect, his thumbs speeding around the screen as he typed.

_ <Is this about what gladio said earlier? I can talk to him if you want> _

_[It’s ok. Nevermind]_

Shit, he was closing himself off again. He had to keep going.

_ <Look, you just sorta hit a setback today. It’ll be fine. Honest> _

No response.

_ <Come on dude, don’t leave me hanging> _

The wait was excruciating; Prompto kept checking his phone to see if he hadn’t missed any notification. Noct was _right there_ , why did it feel like there was miles between them?

_Buzz._

Prompto jumped at the sound, fumbling with his phone.

_[Everyone wants a king. I got to fight, get the crystal, make everything right. But I can’t even fucking talk]_

His frown deepened.

_ <There’s still time. It’ll be fine, you’ll get better> _

He knew he was being too much of an optimist right now, but what else could he do?

_[Everyone’s been saying that]_

He sighed. That was true. The doctors had estimated a few weeks at most for his recovery, and yet…

Something was clearly wrong, but he _really_ didn’t want to admit that. They’d all been so sure Noct would get better, but what if they’d set themselves up for something that simply wouldn’t happen? The thought made his stomach turn.

_[Just sleep. It’s late]_

The light on Noct’s screen went off. Prompto shot him a couple more messages. No buzz, no response. Prompto rested an arm over his eyes. It felt like something had clicked in his mind, as poorly as that conversation had gone.

He had to speak with the others in the morning.

 

They woke the next day to find Noct missing from the tent, phone left behind.

“Shit, what’s he playing at _now_?!” Gladio growled, pulling his jacket on and storming out of the tent as Prompto scrambled out of his sleeping bag in a half asleep panic.

“Is he outside?” the blond asked, voice still groggy, picking up the phone and frowning at the ignored messages from last night on his friend’s lock screen. Gladio rolled his eyes.

“Obviously.” As Gladio stalked around the edge of the haven, hoping for any sign from the vantage point, Ignis found his way out of the tent, cane gripped tightly in hand. “Wait here Iggy, I’m gonna go find him.”

“I’m coming along also,” Ignis insisted, straightening his jacket as he moved towards the direction of Gladio’s voice. The shield took a breath to object, thankfully holding his tongue at the pleading look Prompto gave him. They should all go together, surely.

The three of them set off away from the camp, eyes and ears trained for any sign of the missing prince, with Gladio growing more frustrated by the minute.

“Wait a moment,” Ignis said suddenly, stopping in his tracks.

“We don’t have _time_ to wait around, Iggy—it’s not like he can call out if he’s got himself into trouble!” He ran a hand over his face. “Prompto, take Ignis back, I’ll be back soo—”

“Gladio, I implore you, I may be blind, but I can still damn well _hear_. Just listen.” Ignis was fast approaching the end of his tether, Prompto could tell. The two strained their ears for any sound, barely able to pick anything distinct out beyond the distant sounds of the wildlife. Ignis suddenly pointed his cane. “That way!”

Ignis led them as best he could, with Prompto and Gladio making sure he didn’t run into anything. Sounds of metal colliding with solid objects became louder the further they walked. Not long later, they found their prince, an old blade leftover from the armiger in his hand and a slew of battered rocks and plant life around him. His chest was heaving with exhausted breaths as he let out a couple of rough coughs, a riled look in his eyes as his teeth grit together, sweat dripping down his face. He swayed on his feet, smashing the now damaged sword into a rock, attacking it repeatedly until it lay shattered on the ground—did he even know they were there?

Prompto moved forward on instinct as his friend stumbled, finally catching his attention as he looked at them. “Are you...okay?” Prompto asked, feeling foolish for even asking the question. Of course he wasn’t, that was obvious. And yet it was heart wrenchingly expected when Noct nodded in response.

“The hell are getting yourself so worn out for?” Gladio demanded, pacing forward. “We got a tomb to find, remember?” Noct stepped back in response, his face unreadable.

“Perhaps we should head back to camp and prepare,” Ignis suggested, more as a statement than a question. Prompto cast a long look at Noct before shaking his head.

“How about...you two head back to camp?” he said, somewhat hesitantly. “Noct and I’ll catch up to you.”

Gladio merely shrugged. “If you say so.” He walked a few steps with Ignis before turning around once more. “If you’re not back by the time we’re packed up, I’m dragging you back myself.”

“Right, got it,” Prompto said, feigning amusement as he rolled his eyes. The two disappeared, leaving only the background sounds of the mine lingering around them. Prompto waited until he was sure they were gone before he forced the phone into Noct’s hands, a serious look in his eyes. “I’m not gonna let you keep pushing us away, Noct.” Noct’s frown deepened, taking the phone and typing something before shoving it back at Prompto and walking off, sword summoned once more to his hand. Prompto glanced at the phone.

_[It’s fine, remember? Go help ignis instead, since you won’t let him do anything for himself]_

Ow. That was a low blow. But...yeah, they really had been booting Ignis out of everything lately, making him sit back, not letting him try anything, even during their time in Altissia. Prompto hadn’t said a word about the sour taste it left in his mouth, it must have looked like they thought there was no way he’d ever get better or adjust to his handicap.

Like he’d never get better...the same way they insisted that Noctis _had_ to get better.

The final pieces from last night clicked into place.

The ringing sounds of a sword hitting metal forced Prompto to look at Noct once more, seeing him hacking into the already worn fencing. By this point he was practically wheezing, shaking from the exertion. Prompto’s grip tightened on the phone in his hand; this couldn’t go on.

“Noct, I’m sorry,” he called over, hoping he was keeping his expression and voice even. Noctis stopped, brows pinched in confusion as he side glanced at the blond. Prompto stepped closer, taking in a deep breath. “Last night, when I said it was okay to not be fine—I meant it...even if it means your voice never really comes back.” Noct looked surprised at the words, blade dissolving as he watched intently. “I’ve been acting like getting better and everything ‘being fine’ was the only option you—or any of us—had. I _really_ shouldn’t have done that.” He laughed nervously as he ran a hand through his hair, hoping his thoughts held together well enough for his friend to understand. “I just...didn’t want you to give up, y’know?”

Noct continued to look at him, dumbfounded. Oh gods, had he said something wrong? Moments later, he let out what Prompto could only guess was supposed to be a laugh, before slumping to his knees, head low. The blond was by his side instantly.

“Noct? You okay? I-I’m sorry if I said something wrong, I—” Noct raised a trembling hand, silencing him instantly. He tentatively took his phone from Prompto, typing so that the gunner could see.

_[Not ok. But that’s ok. Yeah?]_

Prompto couldn’t help but laugh, a wave of relief washing over him. “Yeah, that’s okay,” he said with a warm smile. He jumped a little as Noct leant on him, head rested on his chest. Prompto put his arm around him. “You tired? Looks like you did a number on everything you could.”

_[Yeah, a bit. Kinda went off on one. Sorry]_

It was Prompto’s turn to hold his hand up. “Say no more, buddy. You got more than enough reason to fly off the handle a bit.” He tussled Noct’s hair, earning a pout from the prince. “As long as you're safe.”

They stayed like that for a few minutes; the scene around them felt tranquil, less oppressive than before. The only thing that distracted from the calm was Noct nudging him, holding his phone out for the blond to read.

_[Can I really do this? Be king like this? Do what everyone needs me to do?]_

Prompto blinked at the message and sighed. It seemed like such a pointless question—of _course_ he could do it. The thought of Noct working himself into such a state where he was _hurting_ himself because of how he thought he should be just made him ache to think about. “You can only do your best, even if it’s not the same ‘best’ others might be after,” he said honestly. “The rest of Eos is just gonna have to deal with it.” A small amused snort escaped from Noct. “And we got your back, so you don’t have to handle it alone.” He went silent for a few seconds, rubbing his hand in calming circles on Noct’s back. “So how’s your voice doing? Can you use it any?”

_[A little, I think]_

“That’s okay. Save it as much as you can, yeah?” Noct nodded, typing again.

_[Right. Thanks Prom. Really]_

“Don’t mention it,” he said with a wink. “Ready to head back?” One last nod, and Prompto helped Noct to his feet as they walked back through the murky quarry.

 

Gladio and Ignis’ walk back to camp was silent, broken only by Ignis’ quiet ‘thank you’s  as Gladio assisted him. Once back at the haven, the shield was fast to start packing everything away. Ignis shuffled forward, using his cane to guide him, as he came upon one of the chairs, moving to fold it up.

“Leave it,” Gladio said flatly as he moved to start taking down the tent.

“I am more than capable of folding up some chairs, Gladio.” Granted, it would take longer, but he wasn’t going to sit back and let everything happen around him. Gladio remained quiet, focusing on his task, only looking away as the distant echo of metal being struck rang through the air. Ignis’ frown deepened; he’d noticed the past few weeks how Noct’s emotions had managed to become tied to any sound he could make without his voice. Tapping, or fidgeting, or striking objects. It was truly a testament to how frustrated he must’ve been with the level of noise he was currently making.

Gladio sighed. “He’s got more important things to do than go off on some childish tantrum.”

“He’s frustrated, with little way of letting it out. It’s understandable,” Ignis said solemnly, tapping his cane against another seat and reaching for it.

The shield grunted. “Should be using that energy to take back the Crystal.”

“He is, and he shall.” Ignis’ voice was becoming sharper. “I understand your impatience, Gladio, but these things take time, if you would just—”

“You think he _has_ time, Ignis?” Gladio had turned to look at him directly. “Lady Lunafreya is dead and we need that Crystal _now_. All that time passed him by in Altissia, and for what? He wrecked his voice after a single day!”

A silence hung in the air as Ignis remained still, contemplative.

“There’s more to it than that. Isn’t there, Gladio?”

Gladio let out a sharp breath of air through his nose, the frown on his lips deepening. The air had gone quiet again, save for a sluggish wind sifting through the trees and distant sounds of wildlife. “I can’t—” He scratched the back of his neck, digging his foot into the dirt as he let out a deep sigh. “I can’t even look at him like this.”

Ignis’ expression changed to one of curiosity, but he said nothing, hoping for an elaboration.

“Every day he doesn’t talk, every day I see those scars on his neck, all I can think about is how I wasn’t there for him. I’m his _shield_ , damnit, I—” Unpleasant images surfaced in his mind, not for the first time. Finding his prince—his _friend_ —as still as death itself as the waves had carelessly thrown him against some ruins jutting above the water. There was so much blood, as Gladio dragged him away from the carnage he’d thought the Hydrean herself had tried to tear his throat out. The memories made his stomach turn as he gagged on the thoughts.

“Gladio?” Ignis sounded more hurried now, concerned. Shaking his head, the man forced himself to focus on the partially disassembled tent before him.

He rubbed a hand down his face, grimacing. “M’sorry, I…” Shit, his thoughts weren’t coming together well at all. “I got a duty to protect him, but I couldn’t do _shit_ for him back there! I couldn’t...I could do anything for anyone.” Ignis knew he was included in that equation, but was thankful it went unsaid. “I see him, and I see proof I failed my duty.”

Tension pressed down upon them, the camping equipment all but forgotten. “Gladio,” Ignis said carefully. “Is it truly for Noct’s own benefit that you’ve been pushing him so hard? What would you do if he were to never fully recover?”

If Ignis was still able to, he would have seen the colour leave Gladio’s face at the questions. A long silence descended, where neither of them dare speak as the conversation continued to dig deeper, into territory Gladio didn’t want to venture. The still was only broken as Prompto’s laughter reached them from a short distance away.

The shield immediately went back to packing up the supplies, now with a much faster pace, as Ignis remained in place, his head locked on Gladio’s general location. Moments later, Prompto appeared, with an exhausted looking Noctis following close behind.

“Sorry ‘bout that guys,” Prompto said with a laugh, patting Noct on the shoulders as he moved ahead, looking somewhat sheepish. His eyes locked with Gladio’s for a second, before the shield turned away once more, moving to take the folded up chairs from Ignis. The advisor sighed as the two younger members cast an unsure look at each other.

“Stop standing around and help,” Gladio said firmly, tossing a sleeping bag into Prompto’s arms.

“R-right!” the gunner squeaked, moving to help pack everything away.

 

In almost no time at all, the four were on their way to move the giant mechanical obstacle out of the way. It didn’t take them long to find the back up generators thankfully, and soon the pathway was open for them once more. Noctis found himself hanging behind the others, focusing on catching his breath after the multiple skirmishes they’d found themselves in. His limp had steadily become more obvious as they travelled deeper into the depths of the mine; by this point he was too tired to hide it from anyone.

His mind wandered as he watched Prompto and Ignis from behind. Noct could tell the blond was trying to give Ignis some space, to give him the chance to adapt by himself, but he still hovered close with each and every stumble and slip. He’d led them all to this, even if he hadn’t intended it. The thought sat coldly in the pit of his stomach, only snapping out of his thoughts as he almost collided with Gladio, who stood sternly in front of him.

_Great, time get chewed out again._

“So, you really up for this? You’re gonna face your ancestors as you are and show them you’re worthy of their strength, no holding back?”

Noct stood still, eyes locked on Gladio’s, studying him carefully. He reached into his pocket for his phone, before letting his arm drop, merely nodding firmly and walking by the man, casting Prompto a quick look as he caught sight of the gunner’s worried face.

There was something strange to Gladio’s expression, something he couldn’t put his finger on. A look in his eyes that seemed so foreign on the man’s face, like something was wavering. Had that always been there? Neither his nor the shield’s eyes had met for long enough lately to recall.

 

“Man, something stinks down here,” Prompto said, scrunching his nose up in disgust. “Don’t slip and fall in whatever that is.” It really did stink. Noct covered his nose and mouth with his hand, as the air almost wavered from whatever it was that permeated it. His throat stung from it; they needed to get this over with quickly.

The tomb was soon found, blocked by strange spheres. Of course this wasn’t going to be a quick in, quick out sort of deal.

Any chances of that were thoroughly destroyed as an enormous malboro emerged from the murky waters alongside its children. Noct ran a hand through his hair, mentally cursing. They were _eggs_ , of course they were. It would have been too much for things to be simple for once.

Malboros were notorious among hunters and travellers alike—their toxic breath was near fatal to those who came ill prepared to face them. They had a few antidotes in reserve, but would that be enough?

Slicing through one of the smaller creatures, Noct rushed around the area as the malboro let off a plume of noxious gas, trying to gauge vantage points he could warp to and from. Not many, but if he could strike it from behind, it might put them at an advantage.

He could hear the others, racing around and performing damage control on the sprouts that kept rising from the waters. Throwing his sword up towards the tree, he warped passed the enemy and could see a clear shot of its back. He gave it everything he had, striking the beast hard, his lungs and throat already burning from the poisons that hung in the air. Warping back out of the way, he managed to slice off a few of the tentacles that attempted to strike him down.

He could see Prompto, shooting anything he could catch his sights on, and Gladio, cutting down everything in his path with ease, but…

Shit, where was Ignis? His eyes darted around, widening as he spotted the advisor separated from the others, crying out as a malboro sprout tackled him to the waters. A strangled sound left the prince’s throat as he warped over, slamming into the threat and killing it on impact. He was instantly by Ignis’ side, an arm around his shoulders as he helped sit him upright.

“Noct?” Ignis asked, slightly dazed from the sudden attack.

“Y...y-ea—” Noct coughed so hard he began to retch, and it was Ignis’ turn to comfort him.

“Easy now,” he said gently. The malboro sucked in air once more, letting out another wave of bad breath. It was as if Ignis’ face had lit up with realisation. “Noct, I have an idea for us to win, but we must regroup.” Noct patted him on the shoulder in understanding. There was no way he could call them over, the gasses filling the air made it hard enough to _breathe_ , let alone shout. He needed a beacon.

They got to their feet as Noct pulled the Bow of the Clever from his armiger. Firing a few ethereal shots into the air, he watched with relief as they ran over to meet with them. Dismissing the weapon, he blinked hard to right his vision—using the royal arms was always more of a drain on him than he’d like to admit. He hoped it was just that and not the impending threat of being poisoned.

“Got any bright ideas?” Gladio asked, catching his breath as he glanced at the beast.

“Just one, if I may,” Ignis said, drawing a fire flask to his hand. As the malboro began to suck in air once more, he took his chance. Throwing the flask, it exploded, detonating the enormous plant, leaving it dead in the waters.

The remaining sprouts retreated as Prompto let out an enthusiastic cry. “Iggy, you’re a genius!”

“Come now, it was nothing special,” Ignis replied, almost seeming bashful, to Noct’s amusement. They headed towards the tomb together, and at long last, after blasting down the remaining eggs, the Katana of the Warrior had been retrieved.

Noct let out wheezed sigh, absentmindedly massaging at his throat once more as Prompto tried to lighten the mood with a list of everything he had missed from the ‘surface world’. Noct shook his head, coming to a steady halt as he realised Ignis had stopped walking.

“A moment, please,” the advisor said, his voice eerily formal, considering their current situation.

“Can it wait until we get back to the station?” Gladio asked with a sigh, turning to face him.

“No, it cannot.” The atmosphere grew thick with apprehension. “I will not allow this to go on any longer.”

“Allow...what?” Prompto asked nervously, filling in the silence.

“Gladio, I understand your grievances—there has been much to come to terms with, after all—but you must surely understand the position you’re putting Noctis in.”

“What are you—?”

“I understand what you wished to achieve on the train, but your methods have resulted in what could potentially be a permanent injury becoming much more severe.”

Noct tensed up at the words. Did Ignis think he wouldn’t get better either?

“That’s no excuse for him to not _try_ ,” Gladio said, perhaps more forcefully than he’d intended. Ignis shook his head.

“You’re right, it _is_ no excuse.” The grip on his cane tightened. “But I believe you’ll see that he _is_ trying, despite everything—just not at the excessively high level you have set upon him.”

The shield let out a snort of air as Prompto watched the scene cautiously, gradually shifting closer to Noct’s side.

“Gladio,” Ignis continued. “I wouldn’t ask of you to talk now, not when we’re all quite exhausted, but he is your king—your _friend_. Set his mind at ease, that’s all I ask.”

Noct cast a glance at Gladio, confused at Ignis’ words. Did the two of them talk while alone at camp?

“Noct.” The prince almost jumped to attention at Ignis’ mention of his name. “I would like to hope that after yesterday, you will cease hurting yourself further over some point you wish to prove to us. And also...” His frown deepened. “I must say this now, I’ve held it off far too long. If you happen to harbour any guilt towards what has happened to me—or any of us—over the course of this journey, please, let it be gone. I hold no regrets, it was my choice. Never forget that. I would carry on down this path with you, for as long as I am able, if you’ll allow.”

It felt like shock through Noct’s veins; Ignis was too damn smart, how could he figure out so much when he couldn’t even see or hear him? He almost felt like laughing—Ignis really did know him better than practically anyone else.

“Sorry, but I gotta object,” Gladio said bluntly. “We can’t afford to take any more risks, we’re heading into enemy territory and—”

“I know that full well.” Ignis’ voice was louder, more forceful. “Let us face facts. My vision hasn’t improved, and probably won’t. But that does not mean I am completely incapable. Leave me behind if you will, but I shall not stay put until it is proven I am of no use anymore. Only then, shall I bow out.”

Prompto made the sound of a wounded animal at those words, which greatly mimicked how Noct was feeling. It wasn’t fair that Ignis should even have to be in this position, to feel that he had to hold some use in order to remain with them. It may have been his choice to go through this danger, to face the consequences, but it didn’t make the dilemma any easier to digest.

Ignis cleared his throat among the silence. “Come now, we must make tracks.”

 

The sun was beginning to set as they finally arrived back at the station. Prompto felt like he could have cried at the sight of the warm lights that greeted them. They were a sorry looking lot, caked in mud who-knows-what and looking beyond exhausted.

Once cleaned up and changed into fresh clothes, Noct found himself leaning on the railings overlooking the dusty lands below, taking in the golden sight as the sun descended further in the sky. His mind was swirling with the events of the past couple days, which he supposed made a difference from thinking back to the past few weeks and months. Everything the others had said to him, there was all so much to take in.

His grip tightened around his phone; he had just had a message from Prompto asking if he wanted to get some dinner. Typing out a quick ‘no thanks’ message, he let out a breath and hunched over further, soaking in the cooling wind on his face as it filled his lungs, refreshing against the lingering fire that resided in his throat.

“Not a bad evening for enjoying the view.”

He tensed up at Gladio’s voice, remaining still as the shield took a place next to him, leaning on the railings. Moments passed in silence, with nothing but the idle background chatter of the passersby drifting through the air.

“So…” Gladio finally broke the silence, his tone stiff. “How’re you doing?”

The question caught Noct off guard. He glanced at the phone in his hand, before thinking better of it and moving to put it back into his pocket. After the past couple of days, now really wasn’t the time to irritate Gladio further. He froze as the shield grabbed his wrist, stopping the motion, his heart pounding as he tried to lock eyes with the man. Gladio seemed more intent on looking at the phone than at the prince, before releasing his grip and moving back to his previous position, gaze locked on the horizon. Noct stared at him cautiously.

“Just...use it. It’s okay.” He hadn’t heard Gladio sound this hesitant in a long time—was this to do with Ignis’ words earlier? Moving guardedly to type on his phone, he watched as the other pulled out his own phone and read the message.

_[I’m ok]_

Gladio let out a tired chuckle. “You’re not okay, Noct,” he said flatly. “Took me too damn long to see that.”

Noctis wasn’t sure if he felt relief at hearing those words, or if a part of him had shattered at the admission that no, he wasn’t alright. Then again, what part of any of this entire mess could be called ‘alright’?

An awkward atmosphere hung over as both remained still for a while, watching the shadows creeping across the landscape below.

“Prompto gave me a chewing out, y’know,” Gladio finally said, his lips pressed into a thin line. “Poor kid was shaking like a leaf, but...what he said was right.” Noct chanced a glance at the taller man, studying his profile, the way his brows pinched, his eyes flickering with something beneath the surface, something dishearteningly unsure. He didn’t want to press for information Gladio wasn’t willing to give, so kept his phone close, but remained patient.

“Things...might not get better. But all I was focusing on was how things _had_ to get better, because…” Gladio ran a hand through his hair, it was increasingly obvious how hard this was for him. “Because I failed my duty. Every time I see that mess of scars on your neck is proof of that. If you recovered, then maybe I could forget about how badly I fucked up.”

It took a moment for Noct to process the confession, swallowing hard past the ache in his throat. So that was it. The aggression, the way Gladio couldn’t even look at him most days. He could have honestly laughed, of _course_ he wasn’t the only one feeling guilty about all of this. Gladio was never one to be upfront about his feelings, much rather using force—both physical and verbal—to make things right.

Gladio only moved when his phone buzzed once more.

_[We knew what we were getting into when we split up in Altissia. None of it was your fault]_

The man finally turned to look at Noct. “But I should’ve been there, it’s my duty to protect you!” The prince could feel something bubble deep within him, despite his calm exterior.

_[Your duty back then was to the people. If you’d abandoned them to protect me, I’d have never forgiven you]_

Gladio looked as if he’d been struck, eyes widening and breaths shortening. Noctis needed him to understand it wasn’t his fault, just as Ignis had reassured him earlier. The conversation was bringing up a lot of thoughts and emotions Noct had succeeded in keeping locked down, hurting his chest and twisting his stomach as they rose to the surface. Sure, things could have gone differently, but at what cost? No, they made their choice. There was no other way.

“Protecting the people, no matter what. You…” Gladio swallowed hard, his voice quiet. “You really sound like a true king. Your father would be proud.”

It was as if those words alone had broken through his efforts to keep everything buried deep the past few months. Tears pricked at the corners of the prince’s eyes, spilling over and falling before he could even stop them. Insomnia, his father, Luna, Ignis, _everyone_. Turning away to rub at his eyes and inwardly cursing himself, he grit his teeth, hands gripping his phone and the railing so tightly his knuckles had turned white. A hand rested on his back, steady yet gentle, even as choked sobs began to escape him.

“Noct?” Gladio asked quietly. It was heartbreaking just how small he looked.

“W...w-ould h-he thou-gh?” His throat hurt and felt thick from crying but he didn’t care; the thought of his father, of everyone who’d ever believed in him, seeing him as he is now hurt far more by this point. They didn’t go through all this pain and death just for him to become so _weak_.

“Of course he would,” Gladio said gently, now rubbing Noct’s back as the prince finally let it all out, studying the scarring that decorated his skin. “You think he wouldn’t see you fighting every single day, despite everything, and feel prouder of you than ever before?”

Noct wiped across his nose with the back of his hand, sniffling grossly. Everything ached, a feeling of embarrassment rose within him; he couldn’t believe he’d caved in like that so readily.

“Th...th-anks,” he said weakly, managing a tiny smile as he blinked the remaining tears away to clear his vision. The sun was getting low in the sky by this point, barely visible over the mountains as the world grew dim.

“Noct.” Gladio’s voice was quiet, serious. “I’m sorry.” Noct turned to face him once more, hoping the shield ignored what a mess he looked. “Prompto was right, we focused so hard on believing you were gonna get better, we didn’t even figure out what we were gonna do if you didn’t.” He let out a laugh, rubbing at his face. “This whole time, I was forcing you to work beyond your limits, while I was forcing Iggy to hold back. I’m such an idiot.” Noct reached for his phone once more.

_[So you’ll let him do more?]_

“Yeah. I promise,” Gladio replied with the warmest smile Noctis had seen from him in a long time. “But first, we gotta work on new battle tactics.” Noct’s brows pinched in confusion as Gladio playfully flicked him on the forehead. “You can’t talk, so we need a new way of working together. You with me?”

The prince nodded confidently. As they finally headed off to meet with the others, Gladio smirked. “That doesn’t mean you get to slack off though. You got those voice exercises for a reason.” Noct elbowed Gladio playfully in the arm, before glancing down at his phone as a smile met his face.

For the first time in so long, it felt as if a weight had been lifted. So much still weighed down on him, but for once, it felt like they were all going to move forward together.

Everything was still awful, and would probably never be fine, but for the first time in a long while, it felt better, at least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaa gosh, there's still more I could've added honestly, but it was already double what I'd originally planned and I still wanted the focus to remain on Noct (Iggy was a bonus honestly x3). I really hope you all enjoyed it, thanks so much for reading! <3
> 
> ~For updates and fandom stuff, check out my [art/writing](http://doodlebless.tumblr.com) and [fandom](http://angel-bless.tumblr.com) blogs. Also on [twitter](https://twitter.com/angel_bless) too!~

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! <3
> 
> ~For updates and fandom stuff, check out my [art/writing](http://doodlebless.tumblr.com) and [fandom](http://angel-bless.tumblr.com) blogs. Also on [twitter](https://twitter.com/angel_bless) too!~


End file.
